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Every time another college student came to the synagogue, Rabbi Eliezer “Eli” Havivi made sure Monica Stein got to know them — even stopping in the middle of services to direct her to sit beside the person.

The Cincinnati native, attending the UNC School of the Arts in Winston-Salem, had discovered Beth David Synagogue, a Conservative Judaism gathering, during an online search. Havivi’s playful bantering put her in touch with people who became some of her dearest friends.

“It’s really important to me that people not feel like strangers, and alone, when they walk into the synagogue,” Havivi said of what he hoped others would find there, too.

This year marks Havivi’s 18th at Beth David — a significant number in Judaism that means L’Chai, or “the life.”

Those who know him best say he has an incredible passion and enthusiasm — whether it’s asking Bruegger’s Bagels at Friendly Center to make the first batch of the day kosher for observant Jews or directing friends to Palestinian-born Masoud Awartani’s Zaytoon Mediterranean Cafe downtown.

“They have said some prayers at the synagogue during my ailment a few years ago, and I appreciated that,” Awartani said of what he considers the rabbi’s genuine concern for others. “That speaks a lot of his qualities.”

Havivi’s favorite shirt is Carolina blue with “Tar Heels” written in Hebrew, and he has a sticker on his minivan — “Be careful of my driving” — that’s also in Hebrew.

He is known for being an adventurous cook and doting dad to Noa, an eighth-grade honor student; Tal, a rising senior at the American Hebrew Academy; Nadav, a sophomore at Brandeis University near Boston; and Daniel, a first-year UNC law school student.

“His relationships are deep and personal and meaningful to him and the individuals he comes into contact with,” said Marilyn Chandler , the executive director of the Jewish Federation of Greensboro .

Havivi is empowering, Chandler said, paraphrasing a passage from the book of Daniel.

“It’s 'Lay your hands on other people so they can help you fulfill the things you need to do’ — that’s what it’s like for Rabbi Havivi. He extends himself through others so they can be like different stars in the heaven, shining.”

Havivi’s coming to Greensboro was a fluke. He had been offered similar positions in bigger cities.

“The people were so drop-dead nice and eager to learn,” said Havivi, who had been living in Israel.

He thought he would stay for two years, possibly. He fell in love with the congregation while making friends with Islamic and Christian colleagues.

“I’ve come to love the physical beauty of Greensboro — the colors in the fall and the colors in the spring, and the kindness and generosity of spirit of people here,” Havivi said.

“I’ve come to appreciate people asking “And how is your family?” and “Can I help you out to the car with those bags?” and the festivals in the park, and the ease of getting to the mountains and the beach, and the Hornets/Bats/Grasshoppers and the Monarchs, and the lack of traffic, and the calm that comes from people not sounding their cars.”

The community has become an active place for Jewish life, he said.

“He has a way of making everyone feel important and special — like you can do it,” grandmother Elaine Abrams said after getting lines to learn in Hebrew from Havivi during a night class. Abrams is among the 20 women and two men Havivi is preparing for delayed bar and bat mitzvah coming-of-age ceremonies.

On trips to Israel, he has helped guide local Christians and clergy to the Jordan River and walked alongside young people during the “March of the Living” through historic, yet wrenching, Holocaust-era death camps.

“We put our politics and differences aside, and we focus on our faith,” Awartani said of a relationship that has weathered tension in the Middle East. “We are both God-believers, and we march forward to please the Creator .”

Owner Saliba Hanhan of the Jerusalem Market on High Point Road says that Havivi calls him every year on his birthday — and with so much going on at the synagogue, which has 400 families.

“He has a good heart,” said Hanhan, a Palestinian Christian. “He comes here, and we kiss and hug, and there is just that good feeling between us.”

Maybe he doesn’t sleep, joked synagogue member Amanda Stang.

For the Howard Weinberg and Amanda Stang family, Havivi led ceremonies associated with the birth of their children, the eulogy and burial of both of Amanda Stang’s parents, and their daughter’s bat mitzvah .

Most recently, he visited and cooked meals for Stang as she battled an illness.

“He came over one day with another friend,” Stang said. “I had told them I was really in the mood for hamburgers. He shows up with a chef’s hat and an apron and with some patties, and he cranked up the grill, and sure enough we had hamburgers.”

When their son, David, made the varsity football team at Grimsley, it presented a dilemma for Sarah and Jonathan Malino .

They were concerned that instead of joining the family at Shabbat dinner to welcome the Sabbath, the starting quarterback would be sharing spaghetti with his teammates and playing football games during those few months.

“I mentioned my discomfort to Rabbi Havivi and he said, 'Let him go and have a good time,’ ” Sarah Malino recalled.

While it is very important to Havivi for young people to embrace their Judaism and have wonderful memories of Jewish events, life also happens, he said.

“He is very aware of his Jewish heritage,” Havivi said of David, who has several generations of rabbis in his family.

When Greensboro dentist Dr. Mark Hyman lost his 86-year-old grandmother in 1997, he rushed to Baltimore for the Jewish ritual of mourning — but felt unsettled there among strangers.

Then came the call from Havivi that started the Greensboro Hymans on the road to healing.

“'Hey, Mark ... Shalom. It’s Eli — you OK?’” Hyman recalled. “It’s all he had to say.”

Contact Nancy McLaughlin at 373-7049 or nancy.mclaughlin@news-record.com