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(Program note: The following edition of "The 30-Second Gourmet" was recorded before a live audience. Any views expressed do not represent The Food Network. Please heed all manufacturers' warnings.)

Welcome to The Food Network. I'm Harry Hogwart, blogger and certified foodie, and it's my pleasure to feature an up-close interview with TV sensation Kaitlin Kay, star of the hot new show "30-Second Gourmet."

KAY: Hello-hello-hello! How's your summer going? How's your blog? How's your dog? And as we always ask here on "TSG" (that's short for "30-Second Gourmet" and a lot quicker to say, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha) ... Well? Anyone know what we ask?

AUDIENCE: Whaaaat's COOKING?

KAY: Better ask someone who likes to cook, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Just kidding, Larry. I mean Gary, er, Harry. Ask me anything. About my new book. About my new look. My daytime talk show. My magazine. My memoir. Which is about to be a musical. And a major, mega, multipicture deal. Ask me! Go ahead, ask me!

HOGWART: Wow, Kaitlin Kay. First, how do you do it all?

KAY: Call me 2K. It's quicker. But to answer your question, I stay Wired.

HOGWART: Wired, as in the cutting-edge Condé Nast 'zine? Or as in staying plugged in and using technology to streamline your life?

KAY: As in, Wired X-505, the energy drink. It's got a kick like a mule. One of these 23.5-ounce babies packs 505 milligrams of caffeine, 4,400 milligrams of taurine and beaucoup B vitamins. You'd have to drink 6.5 Red Bulls to equal just one WX-505 (that's short for, well, you know). Think of the time you save! Think of the money! I know I sound like a commercial, but I can't stop talking about it! I really can't.

HOGWART: This explains the pace you keep. Tell us about a typical day.

KAY: Well, at 3:30 a.m. I pop open a 505, and I'm locked and loaded. Yesterday, I taped 14 segments of "TSG" before noon, did a book signing at Rizzoli, went home and painted my kitchen, did a guest spot on "The View," co-hosted a black-tie for sleep disorders, then went home and repainted my kitchen. It was too yellow.

HOGWART: When is meal time?

KAY: Search me. I haven't eaten since 2004. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Seriously, I like to munch, I like to nosh, I like to graze. I'm pretty boring.

HOGWART: Your celebrity guests aren't boring. Name some favorites.

KAY: Gosh, there are so many. Reddi-wip low-carb shooters with President Clinton. Peanut butter spoons with Cindy McCain. Hot cross Pop-Tarts with Angelina Jolie.

HOGWART: Sexy stuff. But with all the star-studded cooking shows these days, why is "TSG" a phenomenon?

KAY: Because it's down-to-earth. Famous or not, most of us haven't the time, or appetite, for pistachio-encrusted flounder with a miso sauce. And food is getting expensive. This is about saving money, too.

HOGWART: How about some tips?

KAY: Stop buying food in bulk at those big warehouse stores. Take ketchup, for example. Buy the smallest bottle you can and buy it at a convenience store.

Less driving. Less walking. Less money tied up in ketchup. Keep your assets liquid.

And speaking of liquid, when using energy drinks, consume plenty of water.

HOGWART: Do you always do your cooking show on a StairMaster?

KAY: Cooking? I thought this was "Kaitlin Kay's 30-Second Workout ..."

Contact Lorraine Ahearn at 373-7334 or lorraine.ahearn@news-record.com