The Joke's On You
THIS WEEK'S CARTOON 100209
Send your entries to jokesonyou@news-record.com
Welcome to the News & Record's "Jokes on You" page. Each week I'll post the new cartoon for your caption consideration (see above) and post the previous week's cartoon, the winning entries and all the other entries (see below). I will also try to talk a little about what I liked about the captions I chose and why I thought they worked. Feel free to post comments and ask questions. And remember, this is for entertainment purposes only, so please, no wagering.
LAST WEEK’S CARTOON
No, Jeanette, you didn’t win because of the nice things you said in your e-mail. Our judges were unaware of that when they picked your caption as this week’s winner.
But thank you very much anyway.
If you want to know whatever happened to unicorns, we have several people offering up their suggestions on the blog.
A lot of good entries this week and very evenly distributed --- a lot of different and new names made the short list this week.
WINNER
Henceforth this shall be called the 'Poop Deck' "
Jeanette Bowling
RUNNERS-UP
Wow, some of those sinners can really tread water.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Nobody will believe this. Someone has got to write a book."
Stephen Botts , Greensboro
How can you remember two of everything else and forget one freaking shovel?
Dave Sheets, Greensboro
The elephants are refusing to share a stall with the donkeys.”
Tom Norman, Greensboro
Just once can you book a cruise that doesn't allow pets?
David Graves, Browns Summit
Al Gore warned us this was going to happen.
Darrell Clark
"My bad, Noah. From here out, after we finish up the unicorn stew, it's salads only."
Kevin Little
Are we there yet?
Linda Willard, High Point
Jim Pitcher, Greensboro
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
J. C. Winkler, Asheboro
Bob Beitzel, Pleasant Garden
(If I missed anyone, let me know)
JR. CATEGORY WINNER
Noah, what kind of Cruise is this?
Jessica W., Rankin Elementary
MATURE
Who farted?
J. C. Winkler, Asheboro
"Have you SEEN what the Gorilla's are doing with the Gerbels?!?!?!?!”
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
Speak up! I can't hearing you over all the farting.
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
"Not taking, I said the monkeys are in our bedroom playing craps."
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
"Sh***r was full!"
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
PSYCHIC ENTRIES FOR NEXT WEEK’S CARTOON (entries received before the cartoon even appeared)
Well, Mr. Polanski, you should know...my name is Chris Hansen, and I’m with Dateline NBC...
I’m sorry, Conan, the network has changed your contract. You have to wear that helmet when doing any more physical stunts on the show.
Ken Sheldon, Elon
You mean someone got in trouble for saying one of the "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television" on the show whose first host was the guy who wrote the list?
Ken Sheldon
BEST OBSCURE CULTURAL REFERENCE
“A Dingo ate my baby!”
Tom Norman, Greensboro
"I think we need a bigger boat!"
Lorraine Moretti, Burlington
We're gonna need a bigger boat.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
Noah was the only man notified before Chuck Norris relieved himself in the Atlantic Ocean.
Derek Bourgeois
"Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip..."
David Holley, Greensboro
Oh great, I can't get the Love Boat theme song out of my head!
Cathy FitzGerald, Greensboro
"Tell Gopher I want to see him on the Promenade deck."
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
"Why in the world are Charo and the Landers twins on here again this week?"
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
"Sh****r was full!"
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
Wait … cousin Eddie’s on board?
"There's some kid clinging to the side of the ark screaming, 'Geppetto!, Geppetto!'"
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
GETS AN “A” FOR PAYING ATTENTION IN SUNDAY SCHOOL
“You should stop worrying about your age, 600 is the new 500.”
Tom Norman, Greensboro
“I wouldn’t get drunk in front of the boys if I were you.”
“The pigs are trying to mate with Ham again.”
Bob Beitzel, Pleasant Garden
I don't think that freakin' dove is ever coming back!
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Shem and Japeth were playing ball and Ham's Termite Farm got knocked over..."
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
"Shem and Japeth were playing ball and Ham's Termite Farm got knocked over..."
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
"Hungry or not, we're not eating Ham."
Stephen Botts, Greensboro
They all voted on some place called Arrarat.
Bill Wallace, High Point
It's a little small. Are you sure you know how long a cubit is?
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
BEST INSIDE JOKE
“Those donuts you got from Tim are really getting soggy.”
Chuck Norton, Reidsville
"Wow...this much rain makes me wonder why we moved to Greensboro in the first place..."
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
"I hope the sewage system is better than Thomasville."(Being a High Rock fisherman, I could'nt help myself.)
James E. Ferrell, McLeansville
BEST POEM
“On the ark it’s so boring,” sighed Noah.
“Time just passes by sloah and sloah.
Though I did what God said,
I am looking ahead
To when we will return back to shoah”
Ken Sheldon, Elon
How divine!
Noah followed God's divine plan,
He built the ark as instructed,
Everyone else said that humongus boat
would never stay afloat,
He lined the animals up two by two,
one male, one female, just as he was told to do!
He gathered his family and supplies too and prepared for the impending flood,
Those on the outside who had their doubts and called Noah a fool
were wishing they had listened but it was too late
and they would soon meet their fate,
Using God's plan
Noah helped to save our land.
Now that's divine providence
Nancy Nelson
BEST/WORST PUN
We’ve gotta go back – the elephants said they forgot to pack their trunks.
Ken Sheldon, Elon
SO ENIGMATIC IT’S FUNNY
“A Dingo ate my baby!”
Tom Norman, Greensboro
OTHER VOTE-GETTING CAPTIONS
Dear, did you notice that you only brought one unicorn?
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"When I said I wanted to retire to Florida and take up sailing this wasn't what I had in mind..."
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
"You've got two of everything except bathrooms. Way to go, genius."
Stephen Botts , Greensboro
I don't want you to panic but P.E.T.A. is in a speed boat right behind us.
Darrell Clark
"For heaven's sake, now I know why they call this the poop deck."
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
(Sorry, Joel, the judges seemed to prefer Jeanette’s wording)
I said you were right. Please stop gloating.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
Um,I think both those unicorns are girls.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
Next time, let’s just hand out life vests.
Bill Wallace, High Point
“Now only those with vertebrae this time: 99 bottles of beer on the wall….”
Bob Beitzel, Pleasant Garden
SCHOOL ENTRIES
Noah, what kind of Cruise is this?
Jessica W. Rankin Elementary
From Frazier, submitted by Louise Monroe
fifth graders
Mekensie Bostic: What are we going to do with all the animals? I'm getting tired of this ark!
Deja Headen: Don't you think you are overreacting?
Nahla Graham: I'm tired of being on this ark. I'm getting seasick, and it smells like a wet barn!
TeAsia Holliman: Do you think the animals will have to go to the bathroom? And how will we feed them?
Angel Nguyen: Can you make this boat go any faster? I think there is a storm coiming, and I don't want to drown.
fourth graders
J.D. What? We HAD to bring them. Didn't you see the "adopt an animal" commercials?
April A. I told you we should have taken the bus!
A. J. But the salesman said I'd get 50% off if I.. uh, uh, uh, crammed in another hippo.
Zachary Dude, is it just me, or does it really stink?
THE REST
Are we there yet?
Linda Willard, High Point
We need a cleanup on deck two.
2.) It smells like a zoo around here.
3.) I think I'll just stay up here in the fresh air.
4.) Where's the Ladies room?
5.) Have you seen the pooper scooper?
6.) I see you came up for some fresh air too.
7.) Sooo,who did you get to cleanup after them?
8.) We can just have the monkeys fling theirs overboard.
9.) Dear,did you notice that you only brought one unicorn?
10.) I don't think that freakin' dove is ever coming back!
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
Are you still hearing voices?
2.) If it hadn't rained I was going to have you put away.
3.) Good call on this ark thing dear.
4.) He said for you to get a hot young wife?
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
"Did he just say 'AFLAC' ?? "
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
"He didn't even say where we're going?"
Cal Sigler, Browns Summit
"Are you sure mosquitos were on the list?"
Cal Sigler, Browns Summit
It's probably too late to let you know I'm allergic to animal dander.
You really should have put in better ventilation downstairs.
I didn't see the unicorns get on. Did you?
When the storm lets up, all these animals are going back to the Atlanta Zoo.
Ken Sheldon, Elon
You booked a pair of skunks in our stateroom? I think NOT!
Ken Layton, Carthage
And who do you think is going to have to clean up after them? Not me, that's who!
Ken Layton, Carthage
How stupid! You remember the hellatious Tasmanian devils but forget the cute pair of unicorns. . .
Ken Layton, Carthage
1) Thanks to the platypus we now know you can't put ducks and beavers together !
2) Wait till Darwin has to explain our platypus.
Darrell Clark
"So, where's the pooper scooper?"
Mebane Ham, Greensboro
"Stop feeding beans to the camels."
Sharon Shepard, Jamestown
We've gotta go back - the elephants said they forgot to pack their trunks.
Ken Sheldon, Elon
Double or nothing.
James Durham, Greensboro
"You've got a registered letter from the Sinai Sanitation Department marked URGENT."
Royce H. Riddick, Greensboro
Here is my entry for the jokes on you:
Noah, are you SURE you have 2 of a kind?
Debra Cook, McLeansville
"The galley's full of cockroaches."
Charles Tanquary, Greensboro
Who farted?
J. C. Winkler, Asheboro
Where Politicians came from................OK, we forgot the second Goat and Monkey. NOW what?
Dean Tribbett, VA Beach VA
"We forgot to bring unicorns and dragons."
"We forgot to bring unicorns and dragons and I can't find the bigfoot."
Brandon Breeze, Greensboro
So ! Is this your idea of a Love Boat ?
Males starboard, females port, so boat won't rock !
I'll always be your first mate, Captain !
I told you we could use more trunk space !
Why can't you be like Moses, he always walked on dry land ?
That pair of wooodpeckers could sink the whole boat !
It's bottoms up, if we don't find those two woodpeckers !
Bad news, those two termits are at it again !
There is a reason HE said male & female, Noah
Don't look now, but that's two male elephants !
Let's rock the boat, baby !
Frank C. Leonard, Lexington
"Hi...I'm your local Geico agent..."
"All I asked you to do was take out the trash..."
"What the heck is a GPS?"
"A dog house. All I asked you to do was build Scruffy a dog house..."
"Will you PLEASE just ask for directions?!?!?"
"Well...all the Giraffes have sore throats, the Llamas are won't stop spitting on the Chipmunks, and we're all out of Miracle Whip!"
"You got peanut butter in my chocolate..."
"Looks like your friend request was accepted."
"Now WHO told you to build this contraption?!?!?"
"When I said I wanted to retire to Florida and take up sailing this wasn't what I had in mind..."
"Are we there yet?"
"Did you mention the 'No Cross Breeding' rule before we set sail??"
"I think I left the coffee pot on..."
"Couldn't you have just bought an umbrella instead?"
"Do you think we'll make it in time for Desperate Housewives?"
"Next time try the train..."
"Look PT...I don't know what this circus thing is your taking about but I don't like it."
"My turn! I spy with my little eye..."
"Wow...this much rain makes me wonder why we moved to Greensboro in the first place..."
"You'll do anything to avoid visiting my parents won't you?"
"Have you SEEN what the Gorilla's are doing with the Gerbels?!?!?!?!"
"I don't know about you but I think this whole 'religion' thing is a little silly..."
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
P.S. I missed a great caption for last week. I'm sure you'll get it...
"Well let's see what my 'Anxiety Closet' has in store for me tonight..."
I miss Binkley
They're on lookout for Jaws !
They 'd like you to sing Anchors Aweigh, dear !
They can't sleep after you read them Moby Dick !
I call them my rainbow coalition !
Frank C. Leonard, Lexington
"Who has bathroom cleanup this week?"
Jacki, Greensboro
UMM.. I THINK WE FORGOT NOAH
TAHA MIRMOZAFFARI
"Oh no I forgot to update my twitter before we left!"
Ian Dovan, Greensboro
1. Did anyone take roll call? I think we are missing a "twosome".
2. I've heard of 20 people in a VW Bug but this many in an ark is ridiculuous.
3. Being this crowded, how can we ever go to the bathroom?
4. And you thought Katrina was bad.
Gerry McCabe, Greensboro
The family decided they'd rather go to the water park instead. L.Moore, L.Moore, High Point
"My bad, Noah. From here out, after we finish up the unicorn stew, it's salads only."
Kevin Little
uh Dad...major problem...the pooper scooper is lost.
Sharon Kornegay, Greensboro
Did the lounge lizards make it aboard?
When does the midnight buffet start?
I take it dinner's on the hoof.
Where are you hiding the male of my species?
The giraffes keep peeking in my transom.
The brochure didn't say I'd have to share a shoe closet with horses.
The zebras aren't the best specimens -- their stripes are wiggley.
Joan Lux, Greensboro
The geckos keep bragging about the money they made selling flood insurance.
Joan Lux, Greensboro
Peee-ewww, this would be a good place for a stick up.
2.) Are you sure you got the cubits right?
3.) I'll know better next time you say we're taking an exotic cruise.
4.) We shouldn't have put the ducks and beavers so close together.
5.) Ok dear, whatever floats your boat.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"I think we should throw the mosquitoes overboard."
Bob Fitzsimons, Greensboro
"I know He said two, but there are at least 16 rabbits below deck."
Willa Gold, Reidsville
Well, if I find me a wife, can I stay?
Marcia James, Jamestown
1.) I think I've been pretty understanding but I draw the line at cubit zirconium.
2.) Ok, I admit you were right this ONE time.
3.) Please tell me you're not still hearing voices.
4.) Yes dear, we did need the rain.
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
"What did I tell you, Monkey? This isn't a Singles Cruise!"
Wade Tanico, Greensboro
Sure hope you brought a shovel, Noah !
Why complain, we're all in the same boat !
You were right, glad I didn't miss this boat ride !
Guess two heads really are better than one !
This cruise for couples was really a good idea, Noah !
Don't you think it's more fun traveling in pairs !
Who designed this boat anyway ?
Those giraffes really have a heads-up over the rest of us !
Guess what, I forgot our umbrellas !
Frank C. Leonard, Lexington
This better be the last thing on your Bucket List !
Whose turn is it to waters the critters !
Frank C. Leonard, Lexington
I don't care if she's single, you should've ask Elly Mae Clampett too !
Frank C. Leonard, Lexington
"What do you mean we forgot the Unicorns?! Are you sure?!"
Doug Clayton, Mcleansville
"I told the skunks there would be another ark in 15 minutes."
Nancy Stevens, Jamestown
Wow,some of those sinners can really tread water.
2.) Look at all the synchronized swimming down there.
3.) Speak up! I can't hearing you over all the farting.
4.) Good thing you asked him to repeat that "build a park" command.
5.) I think you have something on your sandal.
6.) I think I just stepped in something.
7.) Was it really necessary to bring the ducks?
8.) I think you're just making stuff up now.
9.)Did you put the cooking fire out before we left?
10.) I said you were right. Please stop gloating.
11.) He didn't mention a sail or some type of rudder?
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
"Now remember, tonight's our date night."
"Bobo wants to know if you want cheese on your burger."
"They want to know if there will be a show."
"Oh my gosh, did you remember to take the movies back?"
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
"For heaven's sake, now I know why they call this the poop deck."
"If you're going to shoot skeet again, I'd better bring in the giraffes."
"I just wish the smaller, tastier animals could have been here to see this."
"Now don't just stop at the first place you come to."
"Have you noticed the cheetahs with their "holier than thou" attitude?"
"Is this the line for the buffet?"
"Tell Gopher I want to see him on the Promenade deck."
"Why in the world are Charo and the Landers twins on here again this week?"
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
Noah says, "All on Board Mate?"
Have you taken a head count tonight, Dear?
Nancy Collie, Reidsville
1.) You could have made the ladies room a few cubits bigger.
2.) I don't think "Monkey Business" is an appropriate ship name.
3.) Where is all the help to clean up the manure? Dear?..Why won't you answer me?
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
Curses! I forgot the Unicorns.
Don Rankin, Greensboro
"I think we need a bigger boat!"
Lorraine Moretti, Burlington
"Are We There Yet?"
Jim Pitcher, Greensboro
Noah was the only man notified before Chuck Norris relieved himself in the Atlantic Ocean.
Derek Bourgeois
"You better find land very soon - we just ran out of litter boxes."
Wil Courter, Greensboro
"Did you enjoy the monkey and goat meat pot pies we had for lunch today, dear?"
Wil Courter, Greensboro
On Saturday I submitted a caption that I'd like to change slightly if possible---
Correct caption should be--
"I think we should throw the two mosquitoes overboard."
Bob Fitzsimons, Greensboro
1. How can you remember two of everything else and forget one freaking shovel?
2. You forgot to fix them a place to do WHAT?
3. Noah!! What do you mean you forgot the shovel?
4. Did I bring a shovel? No, why do you ask?
Dave Sheets, Greensboro
1,) You might want to keep the woodpeckers away from the hull.
2.) We're gonna need a bigger boat.
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
Mt. Ararat or bust!
Hey Noah, where's the poop scooper?
Gray Amick, Greensboro
"Pirates? No, I haven't read anything about Pirates."
"Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip..."
"What do you mean you never got the permit for indoor plumbing!?"
"I don't care if I don't sound like Judy Garland, I want to sing!"
"Somewhere over the rainbow..."
David Holley, Greensboro
"When you said 'cruise vacation', you left out a few details."
Julie Gentile, Oak Ridge
Quick...they need you down below....the hyenas are at it again!
Chris Marland, Greensboro
"Henceforth this shall be called the 'Poop Deck' "
Jeanette Bowling
Just once can you book a cruise that doesn't allow pets?
David Graves, Browns Summit
Guess we'll just have to home school the kids now !
The only school bus we're likely to see is Columbus !
Since we're travelling in circles, why don't we call it the Ringling Circus ?
I've got them all watching for icebergs !
Frank C. Leonard, Lexington
"I don't remember you saying, 'Bring your wife!' "
Bill Crawford, Greensboro
1. How devine!
2. Noah these animals stink!
3. Rain, rain, go away! 3. My allergies sure are bothering me!
4. Dr. Dolittle you're not!
5. I'm getting seasick! 6. Please don't rock the boat baby!
7. Did you remember to pack my nausea pills!
8. You better not be having an affair! 9. Naughty, naughty!
10. Where's your shovel?!
11. Would you like to go for a swim?! 12. Noah, you're getting gamey!
13. There's no fool like an old fool!
14. I want a DIVORCE!
15. I'm tired of fish, are you sure we can't kill that fat cow!
16. Glad you went with the devine plan!
17. I'm sure glad you didn't listen to me this time!
18. Don't you think we need a little devine intervention here?!
19. Shovel it! 20. You call this a cruise!
Nancy Nelson
"I guess it's safe to say we're in international waters."
"Oh honey, I've lost everything we own at the Roulette table."
"Somali pirates ten miles and closing."
"Not taking, I said the monkeys are in our bedroom playing craps."
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
If the aardvarks aren't happy ain't nobody happy.
This rivals being stuck in a plane on the tarmac.
I saw a bird, I saw a bird, honest, I saw a bird!!!
The gazelles are grousing 'cause there's no indoor track in the workout room.
How are the happy meals holding up?
Watch out for a mutiny if there's no meat for supper.
Joan Lux, Greensboro
"Oh, Noah, the accommodations are just divine!"
Kris Voy, Trinity
"I hope the sewage system is better than Thomasville."
(Being a High Rock fisherman, I could'nt help myself.)
"No, I cleaned it out the last time."
"Daffy said to feed him." (look for the small guy in the center.)
"Yes, I do know where my ribs came from."
" I'm already wet, you left the toilet seat up last night."
" We're lost. Now, I know why Man will never stop and ask directions."
" Who idea was it to bunker the dogs and cats together?"
''You means this is not the Bahama cruise?"
" This will be my last cruise. Too much wildlife."
James E. Ferrell, McLeansville
Oh great, I can't get the Love Boat theme song out of my head!
Cathy FitzGerald, Greensboro
What? You forgot to load the Dung Beetles?
Cathy FitzGerald, Greensboro
Are we there yet?
Why didn't you do that before we left the house?
J. C. Winkler, Asheboro
It's a little small. Are you sure you know how long a cubit is?
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
1.) "Since it's finally stopped raining, can we please put those two skunks on the top deck ?"
2.) "This is not what I had in mind when you said we were going on a cruise."
Bobby Parsons, Eagle Springs, NC.
Noah, I told you we should have added more air vents.
During flood season these Holy Land Cruises dominate the tourism market.
Corporate insists we stay with couples and don?t offer singles cruises.
Zebra overboard!
Gray Amick, Greensboro
“It is really deep Noah, really deep.”
Chuck Norton, Reidsville
“Those donuts you got from Tim are really getting soggy.”
Chuck Norton, Reidsville
1. "Interesting ship! What's the meal plan?"
2. "Don't let the elephants mate! They'll rock the boat over!"
3. "I really don't belong in this cartoon!"
4. "My job is to clean the poop deck! That's all?!"
5. "Is this 'Carnival's Booze Cruise for Singles'?"
6. "Where can I find the dining room?"
7. "When's my turn at the Captain's table?"
Dennis R. LaJeunesse, Greensboro
1. “You should stop worrying about your age, 600 is the new 500.”
2. “A Dingo ate my baby!”
3. “The elephants are refusing to share a stall with the donkeys.”
4. “I thought this was a singles cruise.”
5. “We don’t have anymore Dramamine for the animals. I suggest we abandoned ship.”
Tom Norman, Greensboro
"These Cruise Ships Get More Crowded Every Year"
Bobby Smith
Bad news, both of the Giraffes are male.
Dick Ellis, Pleasant Garden
Noah, what kind of Cruise is this?
Jessica W., Rankin Elementary
1) I don't want you to panic but P.E.T.A. is in a speed boat right behind us.
2) Next time you talk to the G-Man, see if he can do something about the smell.
3) The elephants claim they were promised a private room.
4) Take a guess at what the monkeys are throwing at us.
5) Al Gore warned us this was going to happen.
6) Yes, it's fish for dinner again. It's always going to be fish for dinner.
7) So God never metioned building a sail for the boat.
8) Have you ever seen a hippo get sea sick ?
Darrell Clark
"Have you cleaned out the litter box out yet?!"
Katie Clayton, McLeansville
Um,I think both those unicorns are girls
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
"When I said that I wanted to go on a cruise, this is not what I meant!"
"You'd have thought he would have commanded you to bring a shovel, too"
"Are we there yet?"
"Is this an ark or the Love Boat??"
"Now only those with vertebrae this time: 99 bottles of beer on the wall.."
"I wouldn't get drunk in front of the boys if I were you."
"I'm glad we don't have to worry about evil in the world anymore."
"The pigs are trying to mate with Ham again."
"There's a man named Ringling on the phone for you."
"I think it's just a passing shower."
Bob Beitzel, Pleasant Garden
"Sh***r was full!"
"Uh...did ya' think to pack a plunger?!?!?"
"Shem and Japeth were playing ball and Ham's Termite Farm got knocked over..."
"Better call Terminix..."
"There's some kid clinging to the side of the ark screaming, 'Geppetto!, Geppetto!'"
Bob Mannary, Greensboro
"Did you really need two termites?"
"Well, you may have started with two rabbits..."
"Is it me, or does having two fish on board seem a little silly?"
"No, ah don't have any cornbread, Pa."
"We're having unicorn for supper."
"We're having unicorn for supper, sorry there was only two."
"You've got two of everything except bathrooms. Way to go, genius."
"Hungry or not, we're not eating Ham."
"Isn't the beard a little dramatic?"
"The GPS is out. We're gonna have to fine Ararat on our own."
"You need a bath. A little water never hurt anybody."
"I can see a rainbow, a rainbow, I can see a rainbow too. Catchy, huh?"
"Nobody will believe this. Someone has got to write a book."
Stephen Botts, Greensboro
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