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Welcome to the News & Record's "Jokes on You" page. Each week I'll post the new cartoon for your caption consideration (see above) and post the previous week's cartoon, the winning entries and all the other entries (see below). I will also try to talk a little about what I liked about the captions I chose and why I thought they worked. Feel free to post comments and ask questions. And remember, this is for entertainment purposes only, so please, no wagering.
LAST WEEK'S CARTOON
One of the best things for me about JOU is doing a drawing that I fear will inspire little variety, and then see the numerous takes, spins and directions you guys come up with. I'm a professional and I'm afraid I wouldn't have thought of half these ideas. The least fun thing about JOU is knowing so many good captions will be left out because of lack of space.
Remember the Jr. category - ages 12 and under (you guys rocked this week.) Please add your age to the entry if you want to enter in that division.

JR. DIVISION WINNER
"What weather forecast did you listen to?"
Christian Pike Jr., 12 Years Old, Siler City
JR. RUNNER-UP
"You always were a snow-off!"
Emily Olmedo, age 8
WINNER
"I bet we'll empty every milk and bread shelve in the county by noon."
Gray Amick, Greensboro
Among many strong entries, we couldn't resist the local and topical flavor of this one.Good stuff this week, Gray. Several made it to the short list.
RUNNERS-UP
Heavens Gloria - Not another hot flash!
Don Gunn, Wentworth
"I warned you about too much sun!!"
Dennis LaJeunesse, Greensboro
You obviously didn't get the memo.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
Good stuff this week as usual. We also liked the "come to more meetings" one.
"I Knew you would change after we got married, but this is ridiculous!"
Rick O'Reilly, Greensboro
Liked another of your other entries, too
"Give ‘em hail!"
Marsha Elam, Greensboro
FREEZE!
Roy Crosier, Jamestown; Nancy Nelson; Curt Raygor, Summerfield; Ian Knight; Dorothy Sykes, Elon
A lot of entries obviously, but our judges still like it.
BEST INSIDE JOKE
Looks like Rickard is using the "stock" expressions again.
Looks like Dr. Mel is playing with the Weather Maker 9000 again.
Eric Grimm, Greensboro
6-Emily Byrd predicted me, not you.
Max Harless, High Point
BEST/WORST PUN
"You always were a snow-off!"
Emily Olmedo, age 8
"Water" you doing? (worst one I've ever sent it)
Grady, Greensboro
I snow you can change!
Nancy Nelson
"I've got a bad feeling all hails going to break loose."
Tom Norman, Greensboro
"You had better slow down or you'll go straight to Hail.
Mike Creech, Springboro, OH
If you freeze on the way down there will be hail to pay
If you don't go to church you'll go to hail!
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Give ‘em hail!"
Marsha Elam, Greensboro
BEST OBSCURE CULTURAL REFERENCE
This may be the weakest issue of Marvel Team-up ever.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
Too obscure for the average reader, but my personal favorite.
MATURE
My ideal girl has to have enough hydrogen. To me, anything less is just a HO.
Ken Sheldon, Elon
Bah-dum-dah!
BEST POEM(S)
A speedy raindrop on his way down,
laughed as he passed a snow flake,
just floating around.
She told him it didn't matter,
because when he hit the ground,
he would just splatter.
Don Rankin, Greensboro
Winter weather can be tricky, Stay away from that cold air
or you'll cause them more problems that I ever would dare,
but if you make the change now, We'll make this scene clean and bright
and show them some winter fun and some snowy delight
or if you choose to delay we'll make a big mess
and cause them even more stress.
You'll freeze into ice as you fall
and that will not be good at all.
Come on,Big Drip, what's with the delay,
I see children wanting to play!
Nancy Nelson
THE REST
1.) Aren't you cold?
2)Are you wearing that?
3.)Aren't you cold in that outfit?
4.)No,I don't want to race.
5.)If you don't go to church you'll go to hail!
6.)You might want to rethink that before you hit the ground.
7.)You get back up there and get dressed mister.
8)I'm freezing dear.
9.)Not the best form for a non splattered landing pal.
10.)You may fall faster like that but you won't like the landing.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Chill out, dude! You keep goin' the way you are and you'll end up as a big 'splat' on the sidewalk!"
Margaret E. T. Thatcher, High Point
1.)Try it again.
2.)I thought we were wearing matching outfits?
3.)Oh hail no!
4.)My outfit will freak them out in Greensboro.
5.) I know I'm the only flake but that's still enough to close all the schools in Guilford county.
6.) That's not very creative.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
It's under 32. Don't you know?
Andrew Long Age 12, Greensboro
"I told you to turn the heat down!"
"I Knew you would change after we got married, but this is ridiculous!"
You always have to be first!"
" I knew it would never work, we were so different!"
Rick O'Reilly, Greensboro,NC
FREEZE!?
Roy Crosier, Jamestown
Hey, it is my turn!
Connie Jones, Brown Summit
"Pace You!"
Ken Layton, Carthage
Let's try to hit the ground at the same time.
Ken Layton, Carthage
Wait!? We have to make a desision on who is going to hit the ground first!!!
Erica Rayn, Greensboro
1. He ain't heavy, he's my brother!
2. You'll fall like a ton of bricks!
3. You go first and I'll cover you!
4. Let's go make havoc on their day!
5. I know I'm a Flake but you're a Big Drip!
6. Watch out for that gust of cold air!
7. I love making messes, don't you?!
Nancy Nelson
Heavens Gloria - Not another hot flash!
Don Gunn, Wentworth
"You had better slow down or you'll go straight to Hail.
"Yes, I am a flake, but after I warm up a bit, you'll find I'm just like you!
Mike Creech
My ideal girl has to have enough hydrogen. To me, anything less is just a HO.
Ken Sheldon, Elon
You going to the Winter Mixer too?
"I bet we'll empty every milk and bread shelf in the county by noon."
"I heard they've already closed Guilford Country Schools for a week."
Gray Amick, Greensboro
Oh Oh! Someone is having hot flashes again !
Jacques Gagnon ,Greensboro
Nice one, Jacques. You were just beat to the punch(line) by the runner-up by a day.
1.)Hey,wait up.
2.)What's your hurry fella?
3.)Oops, I thought we were supposed to snow on Noah.
4.)Why did I go numb?
5.)I think they're tired of rain by now.
6.) I don't think you tried very hard.
7.) Is it cold up here or is it just me?
8.) I just like to see the schools freak out.
9.) Freezing rain is just too mean for me.
10.)Oh come on. It's Christmas for crying out loud!
11.)You obviously didn't get the memo.
12.) If you freeze on the way down there will be hail to pay.
13.)They're not dreaming of a muddy damp Christmas.
14.) Too soon ,too soon.
15.)Good gosh, you're ugly.
16) Aim for Gene Kelly.
17.)Aim for BJ Thomas's head.
18.)That's not very pretty.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"If you turn this page upside down we are falling up"
"Are we supposed to be decorations? I mean, look at these strings we are hanging on!"
"And they call jumping out of planes sky diving!"
"I will bet you 25$ I will beat you to Johny `s tongue."
"Are we in France? Cause it`s hailing also."
'Don `t be nervous Bailey. It `s your first time. We snowflakes and raindrops live for millions of years."
(Jordan, last week's winner)
"Are you sure you're not running a fever?"
John Elkins,Greensboro
You're going down there just to mess up the trees and roads, aren't you?
You want to play with the power lines, don't you?
Those two-syllable words you'll hear are really one-syllable words with a Southern twist.
Stay up here or you'll freeze.
It's true -- you'll get stuck on a metal object.
I could go down there all by myself and they'd still call off school.
They look like ants to me too.
I sort of like it when they turn the windshield wipers on.
The ants down there won't like a visit from YOU in freezing weather.
I'm lacy and fluffy and pretty -- I'm a girrrrl.
If I stay fluffy I'll get the big brush-off.
They MIGHT take photos of you -- they WILL take photos of me.
Duke Energy likes me better than it likes you!
See that lady down there -- she has a big baaddd ice scraper.
I'll be a snowman -- you'll be a hazard.
Joan Lux, Greensboro
Liked the school reference — very good. And the southern twist on that word …
"Baby, it' s cold outside!"
Bill Johnson, Lexington
1.) Been there, done that.
2.)Have you looked in a mirror.
3.) Uh oh, premature meltification.
4.) Boy,you sure get in a hurry when you see a newly washed car.
5.)I'm singing with some rain...
6.)So this is what they meant by mixed precipitation.
7.)Party crasher.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
Even if we don't win the race, we still get an award for precipitation.
"I told you not to be so Hot- Headed"
Ken Sheldon, Elon
Wonder how many of those men are wearing pantyhose to stay warm?
Hey you down there, put a hat on that kid.
Want to place bets on the Yankee spinning out?
Look at that strange array of clothes down there.
Wow, old Ralph is hauling out the snow skis.
You scream, I scream, we all scream for SNOW CREAM!!!
You'd better get used to being called "wintry mix."
So how do you like the 24-hours of TV coverage?
Slip, slide, fall, squall.
I love falling in the South -- they never get tired of snow!
We're still a big deal in the South!
Joan Lux, Greensboro
24 hour coverage. Good stuff!
"People around here don't look kindly on mixed precipitation."
"So what if I'm a flake, you drip!"
"There you go...pounding the pavement again."
"Well, no two of me are alike!"
"Dude, chill! The kids want to get out of school!"
"You do this every time our relationship starts to heat up!"
"What even precipitated this fight?"
"I want children! Who cares if they're sleet?"
Kris Voy, Trinity
Sleet children? Brilliant, I thought. Our judges didn't flag it, though. Maybe it needed to be reworded.
1.) It's been great H2Oing you.
2.) Did you see that sparrow carrying a coconut?
3.)You're pretty cute for a amorphous blob.
4.) I told you not to ride that thermal updraft.
5.) I thought the invitation said formal.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Oh no, another drop-out in the family..."
Kelly Frye, Greensboro
1.)You really need to start coming to meetings.
2.) NOYELLOWSNOWIMO!
3.) Are my flake spikes on straight?
4.)I thought you were gonna get your flake on.
5.)This may be the weakest issue of Marvel Teamup ever.
6.) I told you not to have that coco.
7.) That coulda been me.
8.)Again?Your bladder must be the size of a peanut.
9.) Don't rush off mad.It's all water under the bridge.
10.)What precipitated that?
11.) I can't believe we earn the same salary.
12.) I'm asking for a raise.
13.)You always think global warming won't happen to you
14.) Nice job Mr. big talk I'll be the best snowflake ever.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
Poem
A speedy raindrop on his way down,
laughed as he passed a snow flake,
just floating around.
She told him it didn't matter,
because when he hit the ground,
he would just splatter.
Don Rankin, Greensboro
Ha, I'm unique and you're not!
James R. Pitcher, Greensboro
8. Freeze!
9. The weather is frightful!
10. Slick, you first!
11. This event will get mixed reviews!
12. Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!
13. Time for slip and slide!
14. Stop fooling around, Crystalize!
15. I'm falling and I can't get up!
15. And they thought it couldn't get any worse!
16. I see a child with a sled down there!
16. Happy New Year!
17. Let's give them and excuse to stay home!
18. It's freezing out here!
19. Brr!
Nancy Nelson
1.) Partypooper.
2.) Aren't you supposed to be in Spain falling on a plain?
3.) Somebody in quality control is asleep at the switch.
4.) Hot flashes again Claire?
5.)Awww,all that work ruined by gust of warm air.
6.) Better luck next time.
7.)That can't end well.
8.) Brace yourself for a rough landing.
9.)You just can't resist Gene's singing can you?
10.)Want me to show you how it's done?
11.) Are you lookin' at me punk?
12.) Is that the best you could come up with?
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Give 'em hail!"
Marsha Elam, Greensboro
Just because he called me a flake, I'm supposed to melt all over him?
Cee Duncan, Greensboro
1) "I know I'm unique, but we'll both just be water under the bridge soon."
2) "I want to be a snowman when I grow up!"
3) "Nice of you to drop by."
Mike Creech, Ohio
"Race ya."
"What weather forecast did you listen to?"
Christian Pike 12 Years Old, Siler City
"Look who's calling me a 'flake' you little drip."
Myra Johnson, Siler City
"Get with the program."
"If I hear Jim Cantore talk about the wedge effect one more time..."
"Frozen precipitation not participation"
"They won't close school for you - Oh, wait, we are talking about GCS."
Jon Barsanti Jr, Hillsborough
"You didn't read the Almanac, did you?"
"You are way underdone"
"Why don't you like children?"
Tom Smith, Greensboro
Liked the Almanac and "underdone" ones
"(if you freeze) I will be you in a past life"
Jordan Suzanna
* "You're leaving!? You said you would wait until I melted!
* "I warned you about too much sun!!"
* "Go rush down, you will soon be in the gutter!"
* "Have you ever heard the "Tortoise and Hare" story?
* "Is that you, Dew? You all look alike!"
* "Please signal if you want to pass!!"
* "I didn't mean it when I said "Drop Dead!".
* "Remember to bend the knees before splashing!"
* "Wow! Nasty acid rain dropping!"
* "We said things weren't working but I did not expect you to fall away like this"
* "Turncoat"
* "But what about our little snow drops?!!"
* "Enjoy this year's water cycle. See you next winter!"
Dennis LaJeunesse, Greensboro
Easy for you to say .. no one's called you a flake!
Cee Duncan, Greensboro
1.)Snowflakes should never look on the sunny side.
2.) I think you were adopted.
3.) Don't you just hate indecisive clouds?
4.) How do you like your new sunroom?
5.) I got a promotion.
6.)Snowflakes should never tan.
7.) Uh oh,I see a kid with his tongue stuck out down there.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
Raindrop singing "Raindrops keep falling on my head".
Snowflake "It's my turn to sing. Frosty the Snowman"
Marcia Minsky, LosCon, CA.
"Aren't you freezing?"
"I'm sorry I put your finger in that bowl of water."
"Quick, pull your reserve chute."
"What do you mean "flaky"."
"You can fall anywhere but the airport is the only place that counts."
"You're on. I say they'll cancel school even before I land."
"You raindrops are allll alike."
"No dear, I haven't touched the thermostat."
"You go ahead, I don't think I'll reach the ground."
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
"FREEZE!"
"Chill out, dude!"
"Hey! Be Cool"
"Ice, Ice Baby"
"You guys are all alike."
"I might be flaky, but you're all wet."
"I think 'Snow Dogs' was a much better movie than 'Waterworld'."
"Snowboarding is very different than water boarding."
"And the coolest thing is, Doppler radar never saw us coming."
Curt Raygor, Summerfield
"Looks like we're a mixed breeze."
"Freeze!"
"Freeze, right now!"
"What a drip!"
"You need to lose weight."
"What's the rush?"
Ian Knight, Greensboro
20. I snow you can change!
21. Snow your stuff!
22. You'll change your attitude as soon as that gust of wind hits you!
23. Things are looking too green, it's time for a change in the scenery!
24. Lighten up! 2
5. There's no business, like snow business!
Nancy Nelson
Winter weather can be tricky, Stay away from that cold air or you'll cause them more problems that I ever would dare,but if you make the change now, We'll make this scene clean and bright and show them some winter fun and some snowy delight or if you choose to delay we'll make a big mess and cause them even more stress. You'll freeze into ice as you fall and that will not be good at all. Come on,Big Drip, what's with the delay,I see children wanting to play!
Nancy Nelson
"I'm taking the scenic route."
"Don't worry--I'll cover your back."
Marsha Elam, Greensboro
"You always were a snow-off!"
Emily Olmedo, age 8
"Why are you snowing when I'm burning hot?"
Alyssa Olmedo, age 4
"Regardless of our state, we'll always have H2O in common"
Eric Olmedo, age 38
1. Well EXCUSE me!
2. They keep sending them younger and younger.
3. Hey, you're not done yet.
4. You are leaving the cloud dressed like that?
5. Looks like a Honda jet is leaking.
6. Why so blue?
7. You look like a guy I knew once, nice guy but a real drip.
8. Looks like Rickard is using the "stock" expressions again.
9. Looks like Dr. Mel is playing with the Weather Maker 9000 again.
10. I didn't realize the snow day was optional.
Eric Grimm, Greensboro
Liked number 2. And 3. And 10 was good. (And # 8 is true.)
1.) Where the hail is Bob?
2.) Who called this meeting?
3.) It was getting crowded up there.
4.) How's the ol' incontinence problem going?
5.) Are we supposed to send the cloud a card on mother's day?
6.) I don't believe we've met before.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
1. "I've got a bad feeling all hails going to break loose."
2. "Hey, this was suppose to be a formal appearance."
3. "I didn't expect you to drop by."
4. "Thrill freak!"
5. "You never did want to be different."
6. "Where's your chute?"
7. "Oh look, a rainbow!"
Tom Norman, Greensboro
I liked the formal wear one, but the rest of our judges weren't crazy about any clothing-related gags. Go figure.
"You're going to disappoint a lot of school kids today."
"Where are you going? No one was calling for a wintry mix."
Brent Wooten, Thomasville
You just have to have your morning shower don't you?
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
- Slow down! Crazy northerners.
- Put on your coat, it's freezing!
- Did you skip science class again?
- Pull your shute!!
- Dual zone heating clouds.amazing!
- You'll convert, they always do.
- "Water" you doing? (worst one I've ever sent it)
Grady, Greensboro
I've heard from many people who thought your runner-up last week should have won.
1- I'm a fancy dude. You're just a drip.
2-No, you did not meet my twin!
3-Don't you envy me? I'm going to the Snow Ball.
4-My favorite poet? Robert Frost.
5-My favorite singer? Phoebe Snow.
6-Emily Byrd predicted me, not you.
7-They can make snow forts and snowmen out of me. What can they make out of you?
Max Harless, High Point
Liked number 6. Topical and local.
1.)Back to basics, huh.
2.)Deep down were all pretty much the same.
3.)I'm solid and you're liquid and if you pull my flake I'll add a liitle gas.
4.)Can't we all just get along?
5.)You must be from the warm side of the cloud.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
26. I told you to dress up!
27. Pretty is as pretty does!
28. I can't take you anywhere!
Nancy Nelson
"Looks like this cloud is Bipolar."
"I bet you catch hail before this day is over."
"Give ‘em hail buddy."
"It's cold out here, how come you're not freezing?"
"Looks like I need to check my antifreeze."
"I'll introduce you to my sister if you promise not to get nervous and freeze up."
"Not even Ed Matthews predicted this."
Gray Amick, Greensboro
"You forgot your coat!"
Marsha Elam, Greensboro
" All I'm sayin' is, it's a historical inauguration. Maybe you could've dressed up."
Mark Weddle, Greensboro
"....but this IS my birthday suit!!!"
"You've got to learn to chill."
"Cool it."
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
Personally, I liked the "chill" one.
Just what we need, another drop-out in the family!
Kelly Frye
"Miss Hot Body."
"You will be up a creek before you know it."
"You're quick, but you will never outlast me."
"He's no kin to me."
"Another bailout."
James E. Ferrell, McLeansville
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